IS THE LINE BUSY?

My journey has had some great people cross my pathway who  have helped me to be restored in faith  in my self and faith in God.  One word that has always been in my world of caring is empathy.  there is a vast difference between empathy and sympathy.  Empathy is understanding what someone else is feeling because you have experienced it yourself or can put yourself in their shoes.   It is show and identify with another's feelings.  Emotionally put yourself in the place of another.  Sympathy is acknowledging a person's emotional hardships and providing comfort and assurance.  For example if you have never put your hand in a flame . you will never know the pain of fire.  If you have not experienced sexual passion, you will never understand its power.  If you never felt rebellious or defiant, you will never understand these feelings.  I could list more and more ...empathy places you in a person,s emotional state and with understanding want to see them whole again and restored.  I think a statement once was said "Don't judge me until you have walked a mile in my shoes."  People are hurting all over our worlds.  Divorce, physical abuse, verbal abuse, spiritual abuse, death, rejection, self esteem and the list goes on and on.  Living in Detroit for 20 years, I saw hurt and pain on each face I met.  Empathy would grip my spirit as I felt their situation and walked with them emotionally.  And I often heard ...no one cares for what I am going through.

I remember my customers... I took the time and listened to their situation.  One had his mother die,  I sat and cried with him.  Another was going through a situation that he just caught his wife cheating on him...I stand and listened as tears ran down my face...feeling his pain.  Another a rebellious child....a parent dont know what to do....I sat and listened...and put my arms arounds them telling them...it is going to work out.  And the list goes on.

While I was struggling in Detroit over my past and failures.  Two men besides my family members called me on a regular basis...a Pastor from Juniper, N.B. and a great friend from Harvey N.B. telling me you are a wonderful person and encouraged me that things would get better.  Never criticized and joined the crowd of critics but had empathy and we would weep together.  I SO appreciate those two men and have great respect for them.

On a daily basis,  we meet hurting people  Do we give them a smile, a pat on the back, tell them they are the best cause we never know what they are going through.  Their smile covers pain.  Empathy is needed.  Gal 6:1...talks about spirit of meekness.  A rare fruit of spirit in this world.  I don't rejoice in peoples failures,  I don't rejoice in individual short comings.  My heart goes out to the hurting.  As I write this...my heart is heavy for those I know are hurting.  I feel your pain to those reading this.  Lately I have awaken in the middle of night and prayed with tears flowing down my face as I felt pain and hurt..  You are so important to me and God.

To those that read this as I have prayed over this blog..trust this is encouragement.   I want to say you have a friend here that cares and reach out to you.  If I in any way can show my heart of compassion to you....I reach now.   My life is a transparent book and I open it to you.  Cause some one had empathy I am restored...to you I reach out.  Send me a note (mmyjourney@yahoo.ca)....or call....I have sat where you sit.

The future is bright.  Days of hope are coming.....my line is never busy.

LEAVING THE PAST

We have all heard the expression "Everyone has a past".  True statement.  That past consist of good memories and bad memories.  Good choices and bad choices.  Actions that have consequences that reflect on character at times.  Addictive behavior, abusive relationships, divorce, unlawful behavior and the list goes on.  And people often associate the past to present when relating to the person today.  One of my greatest battles I had on my journey has been my past.  My past failures and decisions....my past actions and consequences.  They have followed me to the point that I could not go ahead in life.

A failure in my ministry and a failed marriage had left scars on the victims and myself.  I was haunted by this on a daily basis.  I would awake at night and hear voice of my daughter begging me when she was a teenager to come home .  Hear the voices of those in the Church world that I had hurt through my indiscretion.  When I would try to go ahead ....the past would come before me.  Never felt I was worthy to do anything for God or even be consider as any good.  Always felt that when my name was brought up...the only thing people thought of was my past failures.  And sometimes I was reminded of this by individuals that  judgmental in heart.

Sometimes the hardest thing to do ...is to forgive ourselves.  Failure can either be a steeping stone to stronger character or be the cage we live in on a daily basis.

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH was a decision I made awhile back.  My daughter wrote me a letter a few years ago and told me that was a captive to my past and need to let go and do something for God.  Others encouraged me.  I had to make a decision.   Paul wrote in Philippians 3:13 " ...forgetting those things which are behind me and reaching forward to those things which are ahead."

Two things have to be done ..I have discovered  (1) Let Go.  Be released from all negative thoughts and feelings and  run to Grace and let God insert His Word and Love.  (2) Remove the past from your future.  God says what are you talking about when the past is brought up.  He sees me as His child with a future.

Today I am free.  I dont remember my past.  My future is in Christ.  I am preparing now to go into ministry and feel worthy of such because of Christ....my hope of glory.

To all those that are battling their past....let go....the future is so much better and promising.  Run in freedom and enjoy yourself.  .  God bless you and may your journey be full of freedom and blessings from this day forth.

SELF ESTEEM

My journey.. since childhood has been battling with low self esteem.  I remember as a child that I always felt like a misfit in school and never felt worthy of praise.  Even into adulthood this state of mind followed me.  It is connected to depression.  Lost confidence and many negative messages was to to the found of my self image.  Felt worthless and would work extremely hard to please everyone.  Even when I was in the ministry I battled this continually.  Felt like I was always a disappointment to people and could never live up to what people excepted of me.  Rules in the Church world also added to my low self esteem ..knowing that I may never be able to keep up to the rules and when I failed.. would be punished.  Most of all I felt I could never please God. I would continually beg God to forgive me. A failed marriage and a failure in my ministry added to this state of mind also.  Depression continually knocked on my mind also.  It got to the point that I felt I was so bad and going to hell anyway that I took on addictive behaviors.

I started to go to a Christian counselor  in my late forties and I remember him telling me "Norm while you are sinning..God is sitting on your shoulder and saying I am here and will be here when you are done sinning.  He kept telling me God loves you....session after session.  I could not believe it.  Trying to think and comprehend  that God would love me after all my faults and mistakes. No one will ever know the struggle until they have been there.

Somewhere along the way...the lies come to an end when I realized "I am God's workmanship, created in Christ unto good works." (Ephesians 2:10).  I am greatly loved by God (Romans 1:7)  I am a new creature in Christ (2 Cor. 5:17)  It is not I who live, but Christ lives in me (Gal 2:20)

Those endless tormenting night came to end.  Fear of failure started to subdue and I started to think  I am OK.  God loves us unconditionally.  I am so overwhelmed with God's love now.  My heart and soul leaps with joy.

To those that read this and battle this  issue.  I am here to tell you...YOU ARE LOVED.  Walk tall.  Don't fear.  You are special.  You ask "Do you battle low self esteem still?"  I do at times but it is seconds  instead of days.  The moment it tries to march in....I rebuke and speak positive thoughts in my soul.  I am so thankful for the healing.  Be strong my friends!

Introduction

Late afternoon July 27, 1951 my journey started in  the arena of life.  61 years later I am still on that journey.  Seasons and experiences have molded me to be who I am today.  Feeling lead to share some of my experiences..hoping that they may be of help and encouragement to all that read.  Each week...after prayerful thought...I will share.  God has been good to me.